Selling Giraffe Parts

I am a voracious reader of online news feeds, in addition to the news sources to which I subscribe: New York Times, Washington Post, London’s The Guardian, Atlantic Masthead. Hmmm, as I look at the list, I ought to add the Boston Globe. Curiously enough I don’t have much interest in the local paper, the Seattle Times, which I’ve looked at in coffee shops in print form. Doesn’t seem as challenging or substantive as its big city cousins.

From one of these online news sources, the New York Times, I find that there is a booming market in the United States for giraffe parts. Who knew?

I recall reading some while ago that a zoo in the U.S. culled its giraffe herd and fed a surplus young male to the lions, skin intact. Rather than looking like random hunks of meat, the giraffe skin was instantly recognizable and visitors to the zoo went ballistic. The zoo had to issue an apology for feeding a young giraffe to its carnivores.

Apparently the American public has a soft spot for giraffes, which begs the question why anyone would want to buy a bible with a giraffe skin cover, a giraffe skull to hang on the wall, custom clothing made from giraffe hide, or decorative giraffe feet and ankles.

Honestly, if I came into your home and found a giraffe foot and ankle on the coffee table I wouldn’t think you were trendy in your decorating. I’d think you had odd taste.

I’ve read that people buy gorilla hands and use them as ash trays. I mean, who would buy a cut off gorilla hand?

I generally feel as if we shouldn’t have to regulate this sort of thing, but apparently we do. I’m all in with thinking that giraffe feet don’t belong in your decorating scheme, so sign me up as in favor of making the sale of giraffe parts illegal. Gorilla hands apparently already are.

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